bitching
every good day either ends shitty or is followed by a bad day. i don't understand anyone and today for the first time in a long time, i felt like leaving and never coming back. not telling anyone and just going. the only other time i feel like that is when there is school or my parents and i have a wonderful battle about something.

i'm the only one excited about certain things, and i can't blame anyone else for not being that way, i can't force them to enjoy the things that i do, it just makes me feel rather alone.

and shit. everybody else is allowed to be mean occasionally or act apparently bitchy, but i can't even if i'm just joking? do i have to be fucking nice all the time? you guys are probably all laughing at that, since you know i'm not nice all the time, or even half of the time, but most of the time I want to be and I try. I lost all of that wanting to be nice for five minutes, and find that I'm the only one that shouldn't? I don't know if any of this is making sense, and I know my problems are pathetic compared to so many other people's. But still. It's what is going on in my life right now. So. Everything should just stop and everybody should just shut up and I'll stop being myself altogether to avoid problems. laziness is key.

Posted by Maleta at 1:41 a.m.